In Retrospect...

Like any kid born in the mid 80's Kid 'n Play were my idols.. I had the high top fade and said def as much as possible.. When I went to dance parties I even did the dance (you know the house party dance.. kick kick drop spin)... And as much as a nerd as I was I let Kid go when he spelled Dik wrong.. But I will not forgive Mr. Reid for this.. Saw this on Vh1 and then had to post after I saw it on Crunk and Disorderly .. Enjoy this mess and then relive the good old days directly below..

New Budden For that Ass

You know I love Joe Budden.. One of my favorite emcees.. well I got this gem from 2dopeboyz and decided to share with you people.. enjoy..


Edit Here goes Pt 2 this dude is nasty..

Its like Bronx tale or some shit...

What was it that Sonny said? You only get three women in your life.. I always knew for a fact that I had my first two before I was 21.. Over time I begin to realize even more so how much this has been true in my life as I meet the random skeezer and what not.. Granted there has been some good ones.. but the greats is a hard thing to forget.. The major problem is I am affected too deeply by books and movies and I begin to think and act as characters or authors tell me I should act in my love life.. and the biggest influence has been High Fidelity.. See Cusack has always been my boy.. but that movie/book helped me connect further with him in ways Ive never connected with anyone before.. The idea of being torn up over how relationships end, and the immense feeling of guilt that it was always your fault worked for me.. Actually it made me feel not alone.. Because in my late teen years that was the perception.. See it didnt help that both of the "Great Ones" seemed to find their Soulmate or whatever that means.. and Ive gone from two significant relationships in the course of 7 years to 10 girlfriends 5 jumpoffs and and 3 more than one dates.. not counting the many single dates and hookups.. in the three years since.. Its been weird to be a part of due to not understanding this dynamic and really trying to understand how this happened.. While still maintaining this thought that One of those Two Great Ones will end up being the Ultimate Great One.. Until I found this following quote that is..

I'll love you forever
'cause you'll know me better.
For the record
at one time would've married you in a second.
But killed the rekindling dreams
but navigate the friendship
or else
by the time the stress
air out we'll both be dead and friendless.

- Aesop Rock 11:35

See what Ive come to realize during my many High Fidelity escapades is this need to maintain friendships with these woman but by doing so Ive ruined them by not separating past feelings.. Ive come to understand this in so many ways.. Especially because both of them are less emotional than i am and seem to have been able to separate such feelings.. Even though one doesnt really talk to me (totally acceptable I did her dirty) and the other one plays on my emotions but whatever at least Im letting go... At least thats what I like to tell myself today..

Its Been a Long Time

Its been a minute since Ive last written.. Ive had a few reasons to why I fell off.. Ill share what I feel is important.. and the other reasons knock up to writers block..

1st - I wanted to separate my Personal Persona from the blog.. Ive been feeling some pressure because I am so open on the blog with my personal life.. This was started to get me away from that with Myspace and then I realized I was handing this address out like water.. See Im not worried about getting all these reads.. Im worried about offending people unnecessarily..

2nd - When I started this blog, I tried to start this as a place for me to vent about the relationship issues of dating in my area, a place to share my opinions and thoughts, and to pass my favorite music out.. Then I found forums.. Particularly Allhiphop, and Okay Player.. and realized that did the same function.. with more feed back..

3rd - Ive been busy.. for real.. new job.. changed back to job.. "interning".. and all that other jazz.. went back to classes full time.. and just said eff a blog.. no offense but this ish dont pay... and my time is money

With that said I know you're probably wondering why I came back.. What am I doing back if this "ish doesnt pay" and if im "sooo busy".. Well enough time has passed where Im comfortable being open again.. and also now I have the type of issues that I dont feel bad putting out there.. Also other people have started blogs that make me jealous because it reminded me of what I started this for..

So the future format of this blog is this..

1. Personal Stories
2. Music and Movies and ish I feel you should feel
3. Opinions
4. Things Im into

Yea this is the ultimate jerkoff for me.. Something all about me and what I like.. Whatever you dont have to read.. Enjoy Though..